Returning Home

Before heading back to the states, there were a number of things that stressed me out. The first was that--now that you all know--I would regret my decision to recontract for a second year in Japan. This is mainly because I was so afraid that I would be reminded of all the things I missed in America, and wouldn't be able to bear going back to Japan, and certainly not through July 2006. Then there was the fear of reverse culture shock. I was afraid that I would get home and everything would have changed. I also feared far more trivial things, that I would forget my passport, my luggage would be lost, I would miss my flight or to be able to navigate the Japanese airports, I would get sick, or a billion other minor things.

Alas...

I don't want to talk too much about my trip home because the majority of you who read this were there, but there are a few things to note.

So, I have only been gone a little over six months now and in that time the nickel has been redesigned (I thought they gave me the wrong currency), I have forgotten how to drive in America (I got in the rental on the passenger side), I have lost the ability to make eye-contact, I have forgotten that Japan is not in America, and that going to America is an international flight (going home has always been domestic travel), traffic has gotten worse, my sisters have gotten older, and I have changed.

What did I miss most? Besides people, it turns out I missed dairy the most. I didn't know this was the case until my plane landed in Seattle and I saw someone drinking milk and I ordered the largest milk possible. A close second was being able to go shopping, knowing that they would have my size and I would be able to ask for it. There were a couple other things, mostly related to food and commerce.

What did I miss least? The ease of living in America. By about day four of my twenty-one day trip I became very aware of how easy life in America is. This is not to say that the Japanese rough it by any stretch of the imagination, but that when you live in a place where you don't speak the language, everything is a challenge. I have to study to go grocery shopping. Travel is a really big ordeal. Even ordering at a restaurant can be stressful. I am sure being on vacation, though, has something to do with it. I recall one moment in particular where I found myself in a hot tub at 3:00 in the afternoon, having already had two margaritas, and spending the remainder of the day watching movies and catching up on gossip with girl friends...ya, life is really difficult.

The thing that was the biggest surprise, however, was that by the end of the trip I was homesick. I was ready to get back to my life in Japan, and realized that Japan was where I belonged--right now anyway. I looked around at my friends, most paired off in great relationships, or pursuing exciting degrees, or conquering the world in some brilliant way, and I was incredibly happy for them, but not remotely envious. I realized that I was very happy where I am--Japan--and I realized I was ready to return "home." My cat (she can no longer be called a kitten) was glad to see me back too, as is made evident by the fact that she climbed up my jeans when I walked through the door (imagine a cat hanging by her claws, waist level).

It is good to be home.